Op-Ed: ‘I’m a Trans Woman and I’m Happy’

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Alice Wade

By ALICE WADE

I’m a trans woman and I’m happy, it’s really that simple. I recently graduated from college
with a mechanical engineering degree and I’m now working as an aerospace engineer in
the Seacoast area. I just finished applying to graduate school, and I’m excited about my
future career. I’ve happily moved in with my boyfriend recently, and I never would have
had the confidence to make anything like this happen before my transition.

Yet every time I look at the news, I see anti-transgender politicians whipping up a frenzy
about how terrible it is that kids are learning about what it means to be transgender, or
even that we exist at all.

Specifically, when our state representatives come to Concord for the first day of session
on Wednesday, January 3rd, they’ll be voting on two bills from last year that attack
transgender people like me, and they’ll have the opportunity to advance two positive bills
that would support us.

The bills would ban medical care for transgender adolescents (HB 619), and undermine
New Hampshire’s law against discrimination that includes transgender people (HB 396).
The positive bills would make New Hampshire a safer state for transgender people from
other states to receive medical care (HB 368), and would make it easier to change a name
and gender marker on a birth certificate (HB 264).

My experience with gender affirming care began when I was 16 and first told my
therapist that I thought I was transgender. She helped me greatly in understanding myself
and what the process for gender affirming care was. I was desperate to start hormone
therapy as soon as possible, since I knew the longer I waited, the more irreversible the
changes from puberty would become. I eventually was referred to an endocrinologist
who provided gender affirming care which was a huge relief. My mental health began
drastically improving soon after, and nowadays I’m happier with who I am than ever.
Now, HB 619 threatens to take away the lifeline that gender affirming care provided me
as a teenager for all trans adolescents across New Hampshire.

Additionally, because some states like Florida have already criminalized medical care for
transgender people, some of us are seeking care in other states. HB 368 would preserve
independence for New Hampshire medical care providers, preventing other states from
reaching into our state and demanding private medical information and compliance with
their laws.

It’s challenging to change your entire wardrobe, to change your voice to match your
appearance, to come out to everyone you know and get them used to your preferred
name, to face discrimination in social settings, just to name a few. New Hampshire passed
statewide nondiscrimination protections in 2018, but now, some politicians are
advancing HB 396, which attempts to undermine these protections by adding a loophole
to discriminate based on “biological sex.” I live as a woman every day, but anti-trans
lawmakers are trying to reduce me to my “biological sex” in an attempt to re-legalize
prejudice.

These politicians don’t see me for who I am, they see me as a tool to scare parents into
thinking that their kids might become transgender just from learning about it in school. So
much of the focus is on “protecting kids”, but in reality they’re just preventing kids who
need the care from getting it.

I’m tired of being your weapon for fear mongering, I’m tired of legislators restricting my
rights for no reason, I’m tired of being scared that someone will find out that I’m
transgender because my voice is too deep or my shoulders are too broad. I just want to live
my life and be happy as I am.

We’re doing better than before in a lot of ways, but backlash and backsliding are always a
risk with progressive social change. I joined 603 Equality, a grassroots advocacy group
for LGBTQ+ rights in New Hampshire, because I feel compelled to fight back against the
narrative. To prevent anti-trans politicians from spouting lies to rile up their base against
us, to cut through rhetoric and get to the truth, to show how these bans are targeted to
prevent us from receiving life-saving healthcare, and to showcase trans excellence and
positivity despite everything facing us.

I encourage anyone reading this to engage with your community in whatever way you
can. Run for office, have difficult conversations, write to your legislators, talk to a trans
person about what it’s really like, and take back the narrative. I’d also recommend
checking out 603 Equality’s social media for more information and contact your state
representatives about the bills coming up on January 3rd.

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