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InDepthNH.org - The New Hampshire Center for Public Interest Journalism

InDepthNH.org (https://indepthnh.org/2016/11/24/not-for-nothing-in-nh-rules-of-cool-parenting-are-very-strict/)

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children

Not for Nothing in NH: Rules of Cool Parenting are Incredibly Strict

By Jen Hollidge, InDepthNH.org | November 24, 2016
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Jen Hollidge

How not to be a parent.

Jen Hollidge

Jen Hollidge

InDepthNH.org is grateful for Jen Hollidge who shows us what it’s like juggling work and family life in Concord, N.H. Thanks Jen for all you do for InDepthNH.org — Nancy
Not for Nothing in NH
By Jen Hollidge

Rules of being a parent, as taught by my daughters:

1) You are not cool. You don’t get to be cool. This is proven to me when I initially think the word “meme” is pronounced “memay” like a French grandmother.

2) The bands that you liked no longer belong to you once your child claims them as her own and looks at you in shock when she discovers that you had their first album.

3) You will buy craft foam and body paint and attend “cons” to support their passions and help them discover themselves. You will be surrounded by costumed adults who never outgrew this phase.

4) You will teach your children things you don’t want people to know you taught them, like delivering a proper and terrifying “redrum” and getting low to some hip-hop music.

5) You were born before TV, telephones and the revolutionary war in their minds. They’re not sure what the 80s are, but they really like neon and jelly shoes now because they’re “retro.”

6) You really know nothing about technology anymore.  Or anything else for that matter.

7) You are loved and loathed in equal measures as an authority figure, depending on their age and birth order.

8) You’re a micromanager. Even if you’re not. Even if you try not to be.

9) Shockingly you will realize that your little creatures belong to the world and not solely to you.  And also, you have no privacy because they will tell the world all about you.

10) You don’t feel nearly as adult as you thought you would when you got to this point, but every so often you will be struck by brief glimpses of the people your children are growing into.   This will be enough to sustain you through the learning of all of these rules.

I’m Jen Hollidge, a full-time program coordinator, full-time mother of two amazing daughters and full-time wife to my partner in crime for 18 years. We live in Concord, N.H. I have an English degree from the University of New Hampshire and I love to write. 




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